Anger

[Mammamel]

Giggle. Anger is a powerful emotion. One I have usually had a decent amount of control over. However I am not so controlled as I once was. I could blame the medically induced menopause. I don’t however.
Since I have had under the surface anger for a long while, I have done a lot of soul searching over the last couple months to discern my angers root. My goal was to deal with it once and for all, get it outta my system and return to my calm serene self.
What I discovered was my anger was justified. It was not misplaced. It also has been dealt with.
The down side is that a few innocent folks got caught up in the cross fire. Also, I felt I had lost control. Which is where I went wrong. You see I trusted MY control over my anger, not God’s. While the result, after prayer and more searching is what I had intended, the method was not. To put it in terms as best I can, I turn to my favorite book, Anne of Green Gables (which btw is free to read on line!) I will not post the whole thing, just the relevant parts. (http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~rgs/anne-table.html (http://www.cs.cmu.edu/%7Ergs/anne-table.html))

“It was very wicked of me to fly into a temper because you told me the truth. What I said to you was true, too, but I shouldn't have said it.” However a lot that was said to or about me is not or was not the truth. Bits of truth made it in, but the whole of it is not. However, it was still wicked of me to get into a temper over it.
And so closes this chapter in my life. The road is never dull. Usually quiet but never dull.

[maggie]

Yes, it is ever so easy to forget that self control is the fruit of the Spirit. Especially for those of us who in our own 'selves' do normally have a decent measure of it.

The line from Scripture that came to my mind while reading your post was 'speaking the truth in love'. I went to look for it and it is in Ephesians 4. Wonderful chapter, that. Says a lot about anger, teaching, dealing with one another. Has come up in my reading a lot lately, and in my praying.

Our right to ourselves, our anger, our point of view, our institutions are to become secondary in the life of a Christian. I know, easy to say, hard to do....Nancy Leigh DeMoss has some wonderful teaching about this.

This entire thing has grieved me to no end. I have made no decisions because of hormones, too. The last two weeks were my bad weeks, and I make a point of not making decisions when thinking that way. Also, husband is going in for a heart cath Tuesday. Kind of an overwhelming time.

Just know I am praying.

Maggie

[teakettle]

A faithful friend is a strong defense: and he that hath found such an one hath found a treasure. Ecc 6:14

We treasure you and we know you treasure us...a true friend is someone who accepts you with all the human emotions that go with it...and has your back when the chips are down....and we know that we have that friend in you, and you in us.
:bighug:

[Jester]

Mel, once in a while you'll see that I'm involved in a discussion, then suddenly drop out. Everytime it has been because I've stated my case, maybe even defended my position, then started to get emotional about it. That's when I walk away. I don't expect everyone to agree with me, but they aren't going to change my opinion, either. At some point, you just have to let it go and give it to God. Don't forget to let God change you, if need be. None of us is right all the time.

[riverwalk]

Mel, once in a while you'll see that I'm involved in a discussion, then suddenly drop out. Every time it has been because I've stated my case, maybe even defended my position, then started to get emotional about it. That's when I walk away. I don't expect everyone to agree with me, but they aren't going to change my opinion, either. At some point, you just have to let it go and give it to God. Don't forget to let God change you, if need be. None of us is right all the time.

WELL SAID
ANGER IS MY THORN IN THE FLESH GOD HAS DONE A GREAT WORK IN CONCERNING THAT AREA THANK YOU LORD

[teakettle]

i've had this post on my mind all morning...i wanted to add another thought about anger...

Mel....accept your anger and remember that Jesus had no problem whatsoever in saying how angry he was with the scribes, Pharisees, religious leaders and those who made the temple into a trading post. He was really angry, and he did something constructive with his anger. He gave it voice and direction. He told the religious movers and shakers what a bunch of hypocrites they were and he fired off the seven deadly woes at them, expressing in minute detail what was going to happen to them for their callous approach to their religious duties.
He never let his anger fester...he dealt with it before the sun set...and he tells us that we can't give complete glory to God until we put the negativity associated with anger to rest. So don't let it fester.
Expressing anger for the right reasons is also healthy, as you will find in the OT, where we saw many times when God got angry for the right reasons:

expressing anger for the emptiness of worship
for turning away from truth and righteousness
for vain and empty promises
for the way we treat each other
for the nastiness of the nations

I find it helps when I am angry to ask myself 2 questions: first "Is it right for me to be angry?" the answer was "yes" in your situation. And then I ask myself "What are you going to do about it and how am I going to deal with it?" and you have dealt with it, in my opinion you have dealt with it better than most people could in the public forum in which it was pushed by another. And finally I pray:

God, we cannot hide the angers and hurts that are deep within us. Especially we cannot hide them from you. Help us expose the hidden anger and deal with it in ways that lead us toward your love, for we ask this in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen

and then I move on and move forward.

hugs

[cookinmom]

God sure gets angry. And we're told to be angry and sin not. Sometimes it's right to be angry. We have to be angry when evil is being perpetrated.

The trick is what you do with it.

Gayle, I think you have the best solution for things that happen here.

[Calico Prairie]

Glad you're moving on now, Mel. It's great when God gives us the freedom through healing to do so. :)

:bighug:

[MissMaggie]

Aww sweetie, we're all mortal, we all sin. That's why Jesus died for us, 'cause He knew how much we ALL need forgivness. You're not alone at all. Lord knows I make mistakes over and over again and keep looking back at myself and saying "Jimminey Cricket! I knew better than that. What was I thinking?"

Maggie (from Alabama) has mentioned to me a couple of times that part of accepting God's forgivness is forgiving ourselves. All I can say to that is Amen.

[teakettle]

amen Maggie! :)

[gerrie]

We are all works in progress, and have you ever noticed, it is our failures we learn the most from. When we succeed we don't pay a lot of attention to the whys and whatfors, but failure makes us think and pray.

[Prayingmom2]

We all lose our tempers, it's part of being human. I know I sure do my fair share. It's just something to take day by day and try to improve on ourselves.

When something gets to me online, I just stop reading it. I no longer post on it, because I just wind up making it worse. It's not easy for me to "be the bigger person and walk away", but I know that's what God would rather have me do.

Accept that you are human, we all mess up. I don't know the circumstances here, but at least you are owning up to your sin and trying to keep from your anger. It takes courage to admit when we do wrong, or even when we feel wrongly about someone. I have a hard time admitting it when I'm wrong.

[GrammyGoo]

Mel-
Thankful to the Lord for you sister. :love0085:

Thank you for all you do to make this forum a "safe" place for women to come together for fellowships, friendship, learning and growing.

None of us will always do everything right. We are imperfect humans saved by a perfect Saviour.

Blessings, Ella

1Pe:2:20: For what glory is it, if, when ye be buffeted for your faults, ye shall take it patiently? but if, when ye do well, and suffer for it, ye take it patiently, this is acceptable with God.